What’s love got to do with healing?
When my son was little he used to get angry listening to the radio in the car — “Why are ALL the songs about LOVE?!” Love is a Battlefield. All You Need is Love. Endless Love. Tainted Love. Baby Love. Modern Love. Stupid Love. Crazy Little Thing Called Love. Is This Love? What’s Love Got to Do With It?
Of course there are many different kinds of love, and recently I was thinking about how to describe the “love” I feel during sessions with clients. It’s not romantic love, clearly. It’s powerful and yet soft, coming from me and also through me. It’s closely related to “compassion,” but even that feels like just one aspect of it. While I don’t say “I love you” to my clients, I do love them, in this way. There just isn’t quite the right word for it.*
I visited an exhibition on James Baldwin while I was mulling over this topic, and I was struck by this quote: “Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within.”
A little chime went off inside when I read it. Yes, that’s what I’m talking about. He goes on to write: “I use the word "love" here not merely in the personal sense but as a state of being, or a state of grace — not in the infantile American sense of being made happy but in the tough and universal sense of quest and daring and growth.” (From Baldwin’s 1963 book of essays, The Fire Next Time.)
Yes, love as a state of being, a state of grace. That’s the love that heals. When I work with clients I use that universal frequency to envelop them. I witness how this energy invites openness, calm, and acceptance. As I hold the frequency the body starts to relax on a deep level, allowing light into the dark corners, letting sick, depleted, ashamed, rejected, or activated parts be held. This “love” isn’t weak or sappy; it nudges us on the daring quest of growth. When we are held in this powerful state, we can feel free enough and safe enough to let ourselves be fully seen. It’s a relief.
It can be challenging to access that loving energetic state when we’re struggling. Sometimes we don’t feel easy to love, and yet of course that’s when it’s most important. And the parts that feel the least lovable are the ones that need “love” the most. If “love” for all your parts and pieces doesn’t feel accessible to you, please join me in a session or in a group. I will hold you in “love,” so to speak, and help you find your way.
*In “The Little Love Book,” artist Elyse Poppers compiled 267 words for “love” in Sanskrit. “To bestow by shining upon” is pretty close!
